Almost everyone who has taken on a leadership role has initially thought about what the changes they will need to make to others.
We make these plans based on our perception of the team’s weaknesses and often focus on correcting other people’s behavior and actions. However, a lot of the time this outward focus stems from a misconception that our teams are responsible for our own feelings and outcomes. This is naturally untrue yet can be a common assumption amid the collaborative workflow of a team setting.
This is why one of the most important (and underrated) disciplines of leadership is to lead yourself first. This is your opportunity to take stock of who you are, how you behave, and how you can grow as a person in order to empower those around you to do the same.
In this article, we explore what this notion of leading yourself first means and how you can implement it in your own life and career.
We’ll also delve into the concept of self-awareness and self-reflection, breaking down each component and why it’s essential to growth. Finally, we’ll share some exercises you can try to get started on this journey toward self-improvement, alongside some helpful tools and resources to take away.
The Power of Self-Reflection: Two Sides of the Same Coin
Self-reflection and self-awareness are two related but distinct concepts that are often spoken about interchangeably. Self-awareness is a trait that some may be more naturally in tune with than others. It relates to a deeper understanding of who you are, what makes you tick, what your priorities are, and how you interrelate with the world around you.
Self-reflection is a more deliberate practice that empowers you to assess your thoughts and actions and evaluate your personal and professional growth.
Both are incredibly powerful tools for leadership and self-improvement and should be practiced regularly to promote continued learning and development.
It’s important to understand that leadership starts with you. You must take ownership of your role, how it influences others, and how it contributes to the greater objectives of your organization.
Self-reflection and self-awareness are disciplines that help you do that. Being aware of your thoughts and actions empowers you to make conscious choices about them going forward. This kind of intentional behavior is key to being an effective leader.
The Importance of Self-Reflection
Self-reflection is a powerful tool for leaders because it helps you gain a better understanding of your behaviors and the impact they have on yourself and those around you. This allows you to make any changes or adjustments if needed, helping you to become a more effective leader.
When you take the time to explore your thoughts and feelings, you’re able to identify what fuels your motivation and energizes you.
This can also help you pinpoint any areas where you may need to develop greater empathy or understanding, or where you may need to improve your communication skills.
Self-reflection is also a great way to identify any potential roadblocks or obstacles that you may need to work through to achieve your goals.
The Benefits of Self-Reflection for Your Team
Self-reflection also aids in developing your emotional intelligence. Being more in tune with your own emotions helps you to be more aware of the emotional responses of those around you.
This can improve your empathy and help you to understand the motivations and needs of your team. This insight will empower you to create the conditions for optimal productivity and performance based on each unique set of needs.
By understanding your own shortcomings, you can better address any challenges that your team may face. This will ultimately help you to develop your team’s problem-solving and critical thinking skills, as well as their ability to overcome these challenges.
As you can see, there are many benefits to self-reflection for you and your team when it comes to leading your people more effectively.
Understanding Self-Reflection Vs. Self-Absorption
It’s important to note the difference between self-reflection and self-absorption. Self-absorbed individuals actively avoid reflecting on their actions and tend to come across as arrogant and narcissistic.
This is because they are so focused on themselves that they fail to recognize the needs and feelings of those around them. This kind of behavior can be extremely damaging to yourself and your reputation, but also to the cohesion and performance of your team.
Self-reflection encourages an introspective approach to your actions and behaviors, but it does so with the intention of fostering empathy and understanding, not ego.
This inherently different approach helps you to build stronger connections with your team and inspire others to do the same. This is what makes the difference between an ineffective, egotistical leader and a truly great leader.
Those who take the time to understand themselves and their impact on others often have a much larger toolbox for approaching challenges and inspiring others to achieve more.
So, how can you take these principles and implement them in a meaningful way in your own life and career? Let’s take a look at some exercises you can try to develop this discipline.
Exercises for Greater Self-Reflection
The following exercises are designed to help you develop the habit of self-reflection and increase your self-awareness.
Remember, these are practices you should work into your leadership routine to help you assess yourself and your performance regularly.
1. Journaling
Set aside some time each day, or at least each week, to journal and reflect on events and interactions that occurred.
Think of it as an opportunity to ‘download’ your thoughts, ideally handwrite them, to explore how you feel about the day’s events and identify any thoughts or feelings that you want to explore further.
Try to also include some longer-term reflections on a monthly, quarterly, or biannual basis to go deeper and look at the bigger picture of your progression.
2. Mindfulness and Meditation
Meditation has become a bit of a buzzword in recent years, however, the practice has been around for thousands of years.
It’s been proven to help us become more focused, calm, and balanced. It’s also an opportunity for self-reflection, as you allow yourself thoughts and observations without judgment.
This helps you to become more in tune with yourself and your feelings, making it easier to recognize and understand your reactions and those of others.
Start with just 5-10 minutes a day if you’re new to the practice and build it into your schedule to reinforce the habit. There are also many apps that can help guide you through the process if you’re new to it (see the resources section below).
3. Ask for Feedback
If you’re struggling to be objective about your own performance, it can help to ask for feedback from others. This could be a trusted colleague, a friend, or a family member.
However, if you want truly honest and objective feedback, it’s often best to ask someone who’s not personally invested in you or your work. This could be a mentor, a manager, or a colleague that works closely with you and can provide insight from an outsider’s perspective.
You might also consider a formal performance review if it’s feasible within your organization. This will help you to get a more comprehensive view of your strengths and weaknesses and give you a clearer direction for improvement.
4. Create a Personal Mission Statement
A personal mission statement is a short statement that defines who you are as a person and what you stand for. It should also convey what you’re doing in your professional role and why you’ve chosen this path.
This can help bring your values to the forefront of your mind and guide you in your decision-making. It should be concise and easy to remember, maybe even written somewhere where you can see it every day to remind you of your purpose.
5. Visualize Your Success
Taking time each day to visualize your ideal self and future success can actually effectively reprogram your brain to make more of these behaviors second nature.
Ideally, you want to do this at the start of your day to set your intentions, but you can also do it before important meetings or interviews to help positive behaviors and attitudes manifest.
6. Practice Gratitude
Similarly, taking time each day to think about what you’re grateful for can actually strengthen your emotional intelligence and empathy.
This often naturally leads to more self-reflection, as well as more introspection on a day-to-day basis, helping you to identify what motivates you and what behaviors or attitudes you want to acknowledge and reinforce.
There are many ways to practice gratitude, from writing in a gratitude journal to simply taking a few moments each day to think about what you’re grateful for.
You could also try thanking a colleague or employee each day. Not only does this reinforce a mindset of gratitude within yourself, but it also helps to empower and build trust with those around you.
7. Health and Wellness
Your physical and mental health are massive contributors to your ability to self-reflect, empathize, and make conscious choices.
Make sure you’re taking care of yourself by getting enough sleep, eating well, and getting regular exercise.
This will help to improve your focus and energy levels, allowing you to be more present in your interactions with others.
All of these exercises can help you to develop the habit of self-reflection and increase your self-awareness.
Remember, self-awareness is an ongoing process, so it’s important to continue these practices to cultivate a stronger understanding of yourself and those around you.
Tools for Self-Reflection and Self-Awareness
There are also some great tools you can use to aid in your self-reflection and self-awareness journey. Here are some of our favorites:
1. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)
Based on the theories of psychologist Carl Jung, the MBTI assessment is a psychometric questionnaire that measures psychological preferences in how you perceive the world and make decisions.
It’s been used for more than 70 years and is one of the most popular psychological tools around and can be used to improve teamwork, communication, and conflict resolution in the workplace.
It’s important to note that nothing within the MBTI tool limits a person’s development potential or growth. It simply provides insight into your preferences and suggests career paths and roles that may be more suitable given these preferences.
2. The Big Five Personality Test
Often used in psychology and recruitment, The Big Five Model of Personality is a tool that defines five major traits of human personality in the following five categories:
Conscientiousness: This refers to how organized, thoughtful, and self-disciplined you are.
Agreeableness: This refers to how friendly, compassionate, and cooperative you are.
Openness to Experience: This refers to your level of curiosity, imagination, and creativity.
Extraversion: This refers to your level of social confidence and enthusiasm.
Neuroticism: This refers to your level of anxiety, stress, and sadness.
It’s important to note that these traits are on a spectrum and are not necessarily ‘good’ or ‘bad’. Each has its strengths and weaknesses and this test can help you understand where you lie on this spectrum and potentially where you might like to develop going forward.
3. The VIA Character Strengths Survey
According to positive psychologist Martin Seligman, there are 24 character strengths that are innate to humans.
The VIA Character Strengths Survey helps you to identify your top character strengths and offers ways to use them in daily life.
It’s a great tool to use in conjunction with the exercises listed above and can help give further insight into your unique combination of strengths and weaknesses.
4. The Kolbe Index
According to Kolbe Corporation, “Kolbe Index results reveal a person’s conative strengths” and measures your instinctive ways of doing things.
It’s described as a personality test like no other, focusing on the parts of your personality that impact your relationships, job, and life satisfaction.
The objective is to help you learn how to leverage your natural strengths to achieve your goals and be more productive, motivated, and fulfilled.
A Final Word
Leading yourself first is an essential component of effective leadership. It allows you to become a more self-aware, empathetic, and motivated leader, and inspire those around you to do the same.
Remember, self-reflection and self-awareness are key to this process, and should be practiced regularly to encourage continued growth and development.
Use the exercises and tools listed above to help you get started on this journey of self-improvement, and don’t be afraid to ask for help or feedback from others to gain a new perspective on your behaviors and performance.
With practice, self-reflection will become a natural part of your leadership style and you’ll begin to see the positive impacts in yourself and your team.
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