IT Leadership

As IT Leaders, we are expected to manage our emotions, the emotions of our team members, and our manager’s emotions.

Sound impossible? It’s not! But it does require a strong emotional intelligence (EQ) game.

In this article, we’ll look at:

• What is EQ?
• The difference between EQ and IQ
• Why EQ is fundamental for IT leaders
• How to increase your EQ

What is EQ?

EQ is short for Emotional Intelligence, defined as the ability to:

• Recognize your own emotions and learn to manage them
• Recognize the emotions of other people and empathize with them

So, EQ is all about understanding our emotions and using them to guide our behavior.

EQ vs. IQ

While EQ and IQ (Intelligence Quotient) are both measures of intelligence, EQ is believed to be more important than IQ for achieving success in life.

Why is that? Traditional IQ tests measure cognitive abilities and are used to predict an individual’s potential performance in problem-solving, memory, and critical thinking.

But, EQ tests measure a different kind of intelligence involving traits that enhance interpersonal interactions, management skills, leadership, and adaptability.

While IQ is believed to be static, meaning it is generally unchanged over time, EQ can be improved through learning and practice.

So, IT leaders interested in improving their management skills and developing more productive teams should focus on expanding their EQ skillset.

Why is EQ Fundamental for IT Leaders?

IT leaders need strong EQ skills to deal with the rapidly changing environment and challenges of the tech industry.

Here are some reasons why EQ is fundamental for IT leaders:

1. Emotions are Powerful Forces

Whether positive or negative, emotions are powerful forces that influence our decisions and behaviors every day.

IT leaders who recognize and understand the emotions of their team members can use this knowledge to mitigate potential conflicts, increase teamwork, and create a positive, collaborative environment.

2. Building Relationships

IT leaders often serve as the bridge between technical staff and non-technical stakeholders, requiring strong interpersonal skills.

Building solid relationships with stakeholders and team members requires a high level of emotional intelligence.

IT leaders who can understand the emotions of those around them will better interpret needs, concerns, and motivations and respond accordingly.

This is essential for getting the buy-in needed to move projects forward!

3. Managing Conflict

IT leaders regularly manage conflict. It comes with the territory.

This may be conflict between team members, conflict with stakeholders, or even conflict with your own manager!

IT leaders equipped with a strong EQ toolbox have the necessary skills to manage conflict, whether that means calming down an angry customer, facilitating a productive discussion between team members, or diplomatically pushing back on demands from above.

4. Creating Emotional Safety

IT teams strive to create a culture of collaboration and shared goals, which requires an atmosphere of emotional safety.

IT leaders create emotional safety by managing their own emotions and responding to team members’ emotions effectively.

This helps team members feel safe to share their ideas, opinions, and concerns without fear of rejection or retaliation.

5. Increasing Productivity

IT leaders with strong EQ can increase team productivity.

The ability to recognize team members’ emotions can help leaders to better allocate tasks and create a more efficient team.

For example, recognizing that a team member is feeling overwhelmed may prompt you to adjust their workload or even reassign some tasks to other team members.

This ensures that team members are used effectively and that no one is left behind.

How to Increase Your EQ

So, you might have accepted that EQ is an important quality for IT leaders, but how can you increase your own EQ skills?

Here are some strategies:

1. Self- Awareness

Self-awareness is the first component of EQ.

IT leaders need to be aware of their own emotional responses to situations and able to manage them appropriately.

A good practice is to regularly check in with yourself to assess your current emotional state.

Emotions such as anger or frustration can easily cloud your better judgment and interfere with your ability to make logical decisions.

IT leaders who are aware of their emotions can step back, evaluate, and mitigate any negative impacts on their decisions and interactions.

2. Take a Pause

When facing a challenging situation, whether it’s a crisis alert popping up or a difficult team member, it’s easy to let your emotions get the better of you.

Instead, take a pause to allow yourself to calm down and assess the situation.

Pausing enables you to be more focused, clear, and responsive in your communication and actions.

Taking a pause is not only beneficial for you but also for your team members, as it models emotional control and encourages them to do the same.

3. Put Yourself in Their Shoes

IT leaders, especially those in managerial roles, need to develop their empathy skills.

Empathy is a key component of EQ.

It’s easy to get caught up in your own perspective; putting yourself in another person’s shoes is a powerful way to increase your empathy.

This is particularly important when dealing with difficult conversations, such as performance reviews or disciplinary actions.

Imagine how the other person is feeling and try to understand their perspective.

This does not mean accepting poor behavior, but it does mean approaching the situation with empathy and understanding.

This helps you to respond more appropriately and defuse potential conflicts.

4. Practice Active Listening

Another important EQ skill is active listening, which involves listening attentively to understand, not just to respond.

This can involve paraphrasing to ensure you understand what the other person is communicating and asking clarifying questions.

Being an active listener helps you to better understand the emotions and needs of your team members, allowing you to respond appropriately.

Active listening is also a crucial component of conflict resolution, as it helps you to better understand the other person’s perspective and find solutions that work for everyone.

5. Increase Your Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is a key aspect of EQ.

IT leaders with high self-confidence tend to be more relaxed, have better control over their emotions, and are able to handle conflicts or unexpected events more calmly.

IT leaders with low self-confidence might second-guess themselves, become defensive, or have a negative outlook, which can impact their effectiveness in leading their teams.

Confidence comes with experience, but it also comes with accepting that you will make mistakes and that’s part of the process.

Taking risks and trying new things will help increase your confidence in yourself and your abilities.

6. Practice Leadership

Increasing your EQ takes practice.

One way to do this is to take on leadership roles within your organization, such as volunteering for committees or projects.

These roles give you the opportunity to practice your EQ skills in a controlled environment.

You can also practice these skills in your daily life by being more mindful of your interactions with others, including your family and friends.

7. Seek Feedback

IT leaders who seek feedback on their EQ skills have an advantage because they can understand their strengths and weaknesses.

This knowledge enables them to focus on areas for improvement and develop more quickly.

Feedback can come from many sources, including peer reviews, manager reviews, and 360-degree reviews.

Just remember that feedback is a gift, so embrace it and use it to grow.

Conclusion

IT leaders interested in increasing their EQ skills should focus on developing their self-awareness, practicing pausing in stressful situations, imagining themselves in others’ roles, listening actively, increasing their self-confidence, seeking opportunities to lead, and welcoming feedback.

Increasing your EQ takes time and effort, but the payoff is worth it.

Not only will you become a more effective leader, but you will also inspire your team to do the same, creating an emotionally intelligent and powerful team.

Now over to you! What are your best tips for increasing EQ? Let us know in the comments!